There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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