PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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