we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
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