Non-Jews are for practice
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
It was confusing and full of hummus
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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