quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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