Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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