i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
