Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
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