People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize