3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Screwed.edu
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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