Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
True but thats because hes a fetus.
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Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
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The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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