I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
