I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month