Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Randomize
