I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
