Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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