don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Randomize