dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
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