Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
How does one acquire holy water?
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize