Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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