I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
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