That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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