i just google imaged poop.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
