yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Randomize
