Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Randomize
