Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
