umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
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