how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
