i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
