Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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