I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
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