Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize