The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Randomize
