i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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