I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
