The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Randomize
