Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
