I bet he comes in French.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
cat food counts as protein by the way
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Randomize