i dedicated my morning wood to you.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize