Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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