if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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