Her vagina should come with caution tape.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
17 Women That Lost Condoms Up Their Lady Parts
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
23 People Confess The Most F*cked Up Thing Guests Have Done In Their House
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver