Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Randomize
