Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Randomize
