idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
