Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
