Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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