So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Randomize
