Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
