They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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