He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
