I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
My dad is sitting where you rode me
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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