He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Randomize
